Greetings everyone… this is Osborn’s beard, and I'm back! 

I’m trying to raise money for childhood cancer. Did you know that kids' cancers are different from adult cancers? It's true. And childhood cancer research is extremely underfunded. So I decided to do something about it by raising money for cures.

Now, here is my story: Last year, with your help, I raised $1,140 for St. Baldrick's and I finally got away from Osborn. You see, I had been trying to get Osborn to let me go. I mean, we looked ridiculous together. I was going gray, I stuck out at weird angles, and I was even starting to get caught in the zipper of Osborn’s jacket. And let’s be honest, the only reason Osborn grew me out that long was because he’s bald and was trying to distract everyone from his shiny head. So you donated, and I escaped Osborn. 

But do you know what happened?!? You guessed it! His head got even more bald and shiny, and he grew me back! Now I'm grayer and more disheveled than ever! Hey Osborn, guess what? You're not fooling anyone!

Please help me raise money for this very important cause, while at the same time motivating Osborn to let me go... again. It’s for his own good, and my own good. I can’t take it anymore! I mean, he’s a good guy and everything, but we really need our space, and raising money for this great cause is the only way to get him to do what’s best for both of us. Please follow me on Twitter @Beard_of_Osborn for updates.