Why am I shaving my head with St. Baldrick’s AGAIN? For the 15th time. WHY? Because you never actually get over the death of your first born child. I shaved in 2010 at the Emmaus Shave's first year, where David shared his story and it changed my life. I kept shaving, sometimes at multiple events annually until 2014, when I realized my teenaged daughter needed a mom to "look like other moms." We still hosted events and fundraised. I don't want to shave my head anymore. It is a vanity thing. I've gotten old, had my own cancer and just want to fit in as a divorced middle-aged lady. So what the hell am I doing??? David would be 25 this year. He died in 2011 and asked me to keep shaving my head until there were cures for all kids with cancer. I've been a wuss. I stopped shaving and now I really like having long hair, even if it is very thin from the medicine I take for my own cancer diagnosis. I'm healthy. I'm fine. My hair will grow back. St. Baldrick's was founded by some total badass philanthropic guys 25 years ago and progress is happening! The event I hosted for many years has fizzled out since Tom divorced me and it is time for me to do something badass again to bring into focus how deadly childhood cancers are and how much still needs to be done to discover cures. It is time for me to honor David's final wish. I should have a TWENTY FIVE YEAR OLD KID! How is that even possible? Yet, I find myself here. So much in my life is in absolute flux - both the good and the bad. A reminder that very little is actually in our control. But the reason shaving was so powerful that first time was because it gave me a chance to take power back from cancer. As I think of my beautiful boy, who has been gone so much longer than he lived, I want to #LiveBig and #EmbraceLife how he taught me to do. So this shave, at one of the most precious venues I've ever shaved at, is pretty special. Kitty Hoynes is hosting their last event and it is the end of an era. I know David would love that I'm doing this now, when I don't want to, leading with courage. I hope my head is still a decent shape and my wrinkles don't stand out to much!!! So here I am again, with my hand out, asking for your support. To honor the many bereaved families I've met and the many childhood cancer survivors I've met. To give hope to the mission that means everything to me. My goal is to raise $25,000! I hope others will join David's Warriors at Kitty Hoynes and shave with me or virtually join me to raise these critical funds. Let's fucking GO and be the light for families who need it!