This will be my 10th time as a member of Team Mayflower, the 11th time as part of the St. Baldrick’s fundraiser, and the 11th time I have ever shaved my head.
In fact it is the first time I ever shaved my head that is in a way responsible for every other time after that. The first time I shaved my head was because of Julie Rainwater– she was a wonderful friend.
About 14 years ago, in August – Julie was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer. Over Labor Day weekend, Dennis & I drove down to Arlington, to spend the weekend with Dennis’ son Glen, Glen’s wife Julie, and their kids, Madison and Brooks. We didn’t know it – but Julie had had her first big dose of chemotherapy drugs earlier that week. She had been told what to expect from the drugs as a general rule, but was also told that everyone reacts a little differently to the chemical cocktail.
It was that Saturday night, after dinner, when it happened. We were on the back patio watching the kids play on the swing set when the first chunks of Julie’s hair - shoulder length, thick, sun kissed brunette - shampoo model hair, literally fell off her head. The conversation quickly changed, from light hearted to fearful panic. Julie had been told that this was a possibility and she told us that she had gotten a wig “just to be on the safe side.” After she grabbed about 6 or 7 handfuls, and carefully laid them out on the table, she got up, deliberately walked into the house and came back a minute later with a set of barber clippers.
“Glen” she said, “I might as well get it over with.” She unplugged the fan and plugged in the clippers. Glen was hesitant at first, but while she sat on the back patio steps, he slowly and cautiously shaved her remaining hair off. Julie was still very pretty –even without hair. After he finished, Glen gave the clippers to Julie, and said “you do me now.” In Glen’s case – well there wasn’t that much to shave, but it was the show of solidarity. Well, after Glen went Dennis, and after Dennis went me - Brooks, who was about 4 wanted to do it to – but Julie said no – she didn’t want her kids to have to do or be anything different, just because she was sick.
As most of you know, Julie didn’t make it. The second time I ever shaved my head was the following Spring after she passed. It was the first time I participated in a St. Baldrick’s head shaving. I didn’t know it, but that year was ironically Fletcher Vine’s (the boy who is the namesake for our team) last time to participate in a St. Baldrick’s event – I still remember him up on stage gamely trying to shave the head of one of the pediatric nurses who had helped take care of him, but he was so weak, someone had to help him finish it.
Everyone who participates as a shave has a story to tell about why they do it – my story is special because Julie was special & Fletcher was special.
My hope is that one day it will be a day when we won’t have to worry about someone we care about losing their hair to chemo and an even better day when we won’t have to worry about losing someone we care about to cancer. Please follow the link below and contribute if you can. Thank you.
